A Letter to My Husband On Ten Years of Marriage

Dear Doug,

I set this post to publish way early in the morning, just around the time I woke up on our wedding day, hoping you’ll have a chance to read it before you head out on your bike ride.

Ten years. 10 years! It doesn’t seem like that long ago until I look at pictures and see what babies we were that day. I’m not sure, but maybe we freaked our parents out a little by marrying so young, right after college graduation, engaged before either of us had steady jobs or had lived on our own. We knew what we were doing, though. We knew it from just a few months into our dating relationship.

We can’t quite proclaim, “we’ve made it!” because at 10 years married, we haven’t even been married a quarter of how long we’ll be married for when we’re 80. Think about that. Crazy, right? How interesting that most of our married life will be without kids in the house, even though now, while we’re in the trenches, it seems like they’ll be here forever.

Knowing what we know now, I’m so glad we took those years at the beginning to just be together. You know how hard it was for me, so desperately wanting a family, but even though we don’t have many pictures from that first half of our marriage, I remember it being almost as happy and carefree as our dating years and I’m glad we had that together.

We haven’t been through anything unusually trying, but marriages are not the flowery love stories that we so often are fooled into thinking they are. We’ve had our rough moments as is to be expected, but we’ve come out ahead. We have many years ahead of us and I expect that we’ll always be learning and growing together.

So I want to just say thank you. Thank you for welcoming me that first day we met under the tent where the youth group met for church, my first day on staff. Thank you for taking me out on a date and being patient with me as I over-thought everything about our relationship and my emotions. Thank you for asking me to marry you even though you knew what you were getting into with my Italian heritage and New York upbringing. And thanks for sticking with me even when the personality traits that go along with that all bubble to the surface.

I’m so glad you’re the one I have to live this life with. That you’re the one I’ve gotten to fulfill so many of my dreams with. I’m looking forward to what the rest of this life has in store for us.

Thought it would be fun to read over those vows we said 10 years ago. We chose traditional ones because we thought they were perfect as is and covered all the bases.

“I, Laura, take you Doug, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.”

Doug watching me walk down the aisle

Sainte Claire Courtyard Wedding Ceremony

Now you may kiss the bride

Newlywed Huge smiles

Strolling and gazing at each other

I’d marry you again in a heartbeat.

With love always,

Your Laura Bean

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